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Displaying 0 to 16 of 16
Happier than a two peckered dog
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Really Happy
Well tie me to the side of a hog and roll me in the mudd! (Suprised to see someone). Comment by: Pablo   
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Happier'n a dog with a dead skunk!
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Happy (texan style)
That`s funnier than socks on a rooster. Comment by: Square   
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Happy
Posted by: JoeRating:2.0  
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Happy as a gopher in soft dirt.

How about: "Happy as a tick on a stray dog!" Comment by: Little Bitty Crazy Woman    Rated:5/5
I'm happier'n a tornado in a trailer park! Comment by: Christina    Rated:5/5
Happy as a pig in slop! Comment by: jonc   
Happier than a tick on a fat dog. Comment by: Paul   
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He faces 'em head on like a deer
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Face Your Problems
you might say - "A deer caught in headlights". Comment by: shamus   
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He looked at me like a calf looks at a new gate
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Nervious-He thought that I thought that he was seeing my wife whilst I was out in the pasture
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He's riding a gravy train with biscuit wheels.
Posted by: Joe
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A very lucky person
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He's so lazy that if a pig sat on him he wouldn't say, "Sooie."
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a very lazy person
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He's so tight his shoes squeak when he walks.
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Tight with their money
He's so tight when he farts only the dogs can here him. Comment by: Bill   
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Heavy Rain
Posted by: Joe
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He’s as yellow as mustard, but without the bite.
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scared
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Hold your horses
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Wait a second
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hold your horses!!
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Relax/slow down
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Hot
Posted by: JoeRating:1.1  
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It's so hot the hens are layin' hard-boiled eggs.

Hot as a two-dollar whore on the 4th of July.

It's been hotter'n a goat's butt in a pepper patch.

Hotter than a stolen tamale.

Hotter than two rats screwin in a wool sock

Hotter than a jalapeno fart on a sunburnt butthole

hotter than a nuns cunt on sunday Comment by: leroy   
hotter than a four balled billy goat Comment by: leroy   
It's so hot,the chickens have to use potholders to pull the worms out of the ground. Comment by: Kevin   
Hotter than a two dollar pistol at an all night shoot out. Comment by: Clay   
Hotter than a fresh f*cked fox in a forest fire Comment by: hut   
It's hotter than a four-balled tom cat f*cking in a pepper patch. Comment by: Zach Carver    Rated:5/5
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Hotter than a rat in a vacuum cleaner.
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I think this is an original that I came up with when I was a teenager working on a golf course greens crew in Midland!
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Hotter than Hell's brass hinges
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Hot, very hot,
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hotter than horse piss on a fat mans balls
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Its hot outside
That is disturbing on so many levels. Comment by: Kassey luvs TX   
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